Sometimes I wonder which is worse to be in this world, a homo or an artist. As a homo I’ve endured physical and mental abuse from grade school to high school and beyond. Artists always have to deal with everyone thinking they should get work from them for free. Because my skills were so highly developed early on I experienced things like when I was in vocational education during high school having the principal say to my teacher ‘we better use him before we lose him” and put me on everything from school pamphlets, posters, and even an entire mural in the cafeteria! I got nothing except a lower grade for not getting all my class work done and being graded on things like the mural, that I was not trained for or prepared to do. After moving in with my boyfriend at 19 I endured neighbors complaining about homo’s in the building, mail being torn up and outside pets being killed and thrown back in the yard. Being an artist has only kept me just below the poverty line while making me well known enough so that I’m even more of a target for maniacs and hatemongers than the average queer. I come to NYC to find a place for myself and my work and I do have success in getting things published and collectors who are supportive, but they are so few and far between and it is so expensive here I still have to deal with poverty. My work has raised hundreds and thousands of dollars for many charities over the years. I can never get prices that my things go for at charity auctions because people are free to pay whatever if it’s a charity but if it’s only the artists survival they seem to not care. So many I encounter in the gay art world after acquainting themselves with me mostly snub me or right out stab me in the back or front, some over what they admitted was over petty jealousy, others I can only wonder why. This kick-starter campaign is the first time I’ve ever asked for any help like this and the truth is I’ve already lost the studio room that appears in my video due to another abusive situation I have to endure and the new drawing of Eryc only had one response from a collector who said ’ One of your best drawings ever, unfortunately I’ll pass’, and this was at a rock bottom price. I wish I knew what to do to make people care and realize how much more I could even be capable of if I ever had some help, ever.
—http://www.kickstarter.com/projects/602251826/beautiful-beast-eryctaylor-as-muse?ref=email
‘Pierce and Massimo’ Oil on panel 9”x12” 2009
This image was created from an assemblage of stills from their Treasure Island video ‘Anarcocks’. The study appears in my book ‘Rascals’ and there is a giant poster of it in a couples pad somewhere in England. The Painting is part of the Leslie Lohman Museum permanent collection and hangs in the living room of Charles Leslie’s NYC apartment.
‘Poppy field Pan’ featuring Sam Devries. 11”x14” Green, sepia, black, and red ink wash with black ink and white charcoal highlights.
Illustrations of Walt Cessna by Allen Todd Yaeger Bklyn 09-11
Scooter Laforge 11”x14” Blue, black and sepia ink wash with black ink and white charcoal highlights.
9”x12” drawing of Bryan Slater as Icarus; Blue, black, sepia ink wash with black ink and white and orange highlights 2012.
NIGHTNIGHT by DEDDY